Mirror - Vol. 25, No. 18 - April 01, 2000

              TheMirror
FAIRFIELD UNIVERSITY
Volume 25, Number 18 The Image of Fairfield April 1,2000
Res. Life saves the day
University toprovide exiled juniors with an alternative
By James Buffett
NAUT COORDINATOR
The construction of the new
apartment complex on campus will
radically change student life at Fairfield
University. In the past, a bogus lottery
system afforded almost anyone who
applied for off-campus housing the op-portunity
to eventually get it. The ma-jority
of those stu-dents
ended up at
the beach.
Many new argu-ments
are flaring
up from the more
than 200 Juniors
who will "get the
shaft" from living
at the beach and are
being forced back
to campus to live in i — Z _
Kostka and Claver.
Residence Life, in conjunction with a
board of outgoing seniors from the
Class of 2000, have devised a plan to
ease the transition. A new wing is
scheduled to begin construction on the
new apartment complex immediately.
Along with the new Substance Free
floor on Campion 4 and the Math and
Science floor on Jogues 2, the new
Beach-style wing of the apartment com-plex
will hold many of the amenities
beach students are used to.
Each unit will consist of two doubles in
which eight people will be forced to live,
without closets. Architects have been
contracted to design walls so thin that
one can hear conversations on floors
below and above. The new units will
provide state-of-the-art cooling and
heating systems,
none of which
work, of course.
Sprinkler systems
in the ceiling will
spray at full blast
for fifteen minutes
every four years to
simulate a tropical
storm and flood.
Fairfield Prep has
been kind enough
to donate, from
storage, the original furniture provided
to it Jesuits in 1942, all of which has
been sent out to bars in the area to ab-sorb
cigarette smoke and be peed and
vomited upon by total strangers before
Fairfield Prep has been kind
enough to donate, from storage,
the original furniture provided to
it Jesuits in 1942, all of which
has been sent out to bars in the
area to absorb cigarette smoke
and be peed and vomited upon
by total strangers before being
used to fill fherooms.
1
being used to fill the rooms.
Also included in the plan are monthly
cleaning service, which include the
sweeping of all rubbish into one corner
and leaving it there, in ad-dition
to the wiping of all
surfaces with Glass Plus and
a dirty sock. The master
suite in the Beach Wing will
be given to Ritchie, "the
Mayor," and a bike path
through the hallways will be
constructed so he can ride
by, yell at you and drink
your floaters. For your con-venience,
one key will be is-sued
for all eight of you, and
it will only work sixty-per-cent
of the times that it must
be used. Because of this, all
hallway entrances to rooms
will be equipped with a
small window next to the
door that does not lock, so
that freshmen, sophomores,
visitors and non-students
can pry it open, climb in and
steal everything inside.
Every day in mid-morning
and later again in the after-noon,
a worse smell than the
one that already exists in
your room will be pumped in via air ducts
in hopes of simulating low tides. Each
floor in the new Beach Wing will have a
continued on p. S
Res.
Photo: Mirror archives
Life hopes new beach housing can provide
students with an luxurious way of life
Putting daddy's credit card to good use
By Bloom N. Dale
TYPICAL FAIRFIELD GIRL
Amid all of the noise, construction
and chaos that has come from prepar-ing
for the new campus center renova-tions,
the secret of the sub-basement
level of the.new center is finally out.
Currently, the sub-basement level of
the Barone Campus Center functions
as a passageway for students entering
the building from Bannow or the
School of Nursing parking lots, as well
as Sodexho storage space.
When the new building is complete
in the fall of 2001, this level will be
transformed into the Fairfield Univer-sity
Campus Center Mall and Food
Court.
Designs for the mall and food court
were finalized by Gilbane Construction
at the board meeting this past Tuesday.
Anchors for the mall will be J-Crew
and Crate & Barrel. J-Crew will be
constructed directly below the current
FUSA offices on the south side of the
building. Crate & Barrel will take over
the area that is below the current game
room and mailroom on the North end.
J-Crew management was ecstatic
about the company's new presence on
campus. "It just wasn't enough for us
to just clothe everyone on campus," said
one high-ranking official.
Adjacent to the south elevator will be
The Gap.
The
women's
restroom
will be
renovated
into the
dressing
room and
the men's
room will
be the
storage
room.
Below
the book-store
will be Structure that will share
an internal door with Brookstone.
Across from Brookstone, under the cur-rent
mailroom, Abercrombie & Fitch
will span the latter end of the Northeast
hallway.
Many students expressed their excite-ment
over this news. "Oh my God!!" ex-claimed
Sophie Moregirl '02. "This is so
great! Those daily trips to Trumbull were
killing me. Plus I won't have to put as
much gas in my Beamer."
"Now I'll have to hear 'does my ass
like fat in this' every time I go check my
mail,"
said
Whip D.
Guy, '01.
The
univerisity
did not
release
this infor-mation
until now
due to the
difficul-ties
in
contract-ing
the
anchor
stores. The long, arduous process of at-taining
the zoning permits was the first
step. The permits were held in appropria-tions
committees for three months pend-ing
the school's receipt of the $10 mil-lion
bond to begin construction.
Photo: Mirror archives
The renovated BCC leaves nothing to be desired
"Truthfully, zoning wasn't the prob-lem,"
admitted a Fairfield Selectman that
asked to remain unidentified. "We were
happy to approve it. I'd do just about
anything to keep those damn kids on-campus
and off our streets"
Once the zoning permits were at-tained,
numerous companies sent in bids
for opening a store in the new building.
The school made their decisions based
on in interest level of students and prac-ticality
of their products.
Since the building will be expanded
over the Alumni Hall parking lot and
North plans for an independent food
court have been made for the outer right
side of the sub-basement level.
The food court will be open from 8
a.m. until 1 a.m. in an effort to aid stu-dents
during late night study sessions and
meetings. Hours will be expanded dur-ing
exam times.
Hopefully the addition of this food
court will give students another dining
option besides Sodexho. This undoubt-edly,
will reduce the many reported cases
of food poisoning that the Health Center
deals with every day. Cries of "Thank
God for Taco Bell!" could be heard all
the way from Dolan.